


Karma Police

by shrodingers



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Angst, Character Study, Gen, Slight Canon Divergence, Time Travel, excess use of math, he really does, number five needs a hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-25
Updated: 2019-02-25
Packaged: 2019-11-01 18:25:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17872469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shrodingers/pseuds/shrodingers
Summary: Glancing at his calculations, he smiled to himself. Maybe this was the one. It had to be.Or, in which Number Five tries his best to stop the chaos that is the apocalypse.





	Karma Police

The first thing he saw when he was in the future was there's too much ash. 

He felt it all over his clothes, crawling up his throat and into his lungs, suffocating him of any intelligent thought. 

The first law of thermodynamics stated that energy could not be created nor destroyed, but simply transferred to another form. He always thought this as true, until he saw the scene before him. Was everything he learned all in vain? Was it too late for him and everyone else? 

"Vanya?" He called out to the wasteland. No response. 

"Ben? Dad? You guys there?" his voice was getting smaller. He hadn't felt this scared since.. ever. He was Number Five: teleporter, virtuoso, and now, hypothetical warped spacetime traveler. Scared wasn't on the list of qualities one used to describe him. But now, as he's gazing at his surroundings, he was fucking terrified. 

Scrambling through the waste, he spotted an all-too-familiar building. A sigh of relief washed over his body. Finally, something he recognized. Clumsily making his way past the gate, he stared up at what remained of that building. His throat suddenly went dry, as though he'd swallowed sulfuric acid. He'd always dreamed of escaping that wretched place and that wretched man they called Father, and now that it's finally gone - he didn't want to find out the possibility.

His thoughts were interrupted with a sickening crunch below his left foot. Lifting his foot to inspect what made that noise, he drew back in horror. It was a hand. Not just any hand, Luther's hand. 

No, it couldn't be. It wasn't possible! He dug furiously through the rubble, blood soaking his hands. Lo and behold, he saw Luther's face of acceptance. Acceptance that he was indeed going to die. Clawing around, he spotted several more bodies. No. No, no, no. It was just a one-way trip. He just wanted to see the future and go home. Maybe he could write a book about it one day. He wasn't expecting his this. 

As he let out a guttural scream, he heard the last thing Father told him, replaying over and over in his head like a broken tape recorder: "Don't time travel, you'll get stuck." Stuck he was. 

!! 

"Five? What are you doing here?" whispered Vanya. 

"I need to tell you something." There it was. His no-nonsense tone of getting straight to the point. Vanya stared back at him, unblinking.

"The door was open, you could have just knocked like a normal person." Vanya grinned down at him. Five chuckled softly. Normal. Was that what they were? They got into this shitty life of fighting crime and listening to orders until the only thoughts they had were Father's. Normal wasn't a word used to describe their family. 

"I need to tell you something." he repeated his sentence once more, his voice urgent. Vanya sensed this and ushered him in, closing the door quietly behind her. 

"What is it, then?" she asked, searching for any signs of despair on his face. (They were masked by his smug outlook, like a solution within a question.) 

Five tensed in the dark. "When I was lost in time, I, er, found something," He paused for a millisecond, before continuing. "I was in the future, in this year, actually. And I found -" he shook his head, trying to forget the grisly images. The last thing he needed were painful memories and concerned siblings. "The world's going to end. In eight days." 

Vanya stared back at him, wearing an expression that even he couldn't recognize. Was it confusion? Fear? Or worse, acceptance for her impending fate? "𝘚𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴, 𝘴𝘰 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘣𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦." He hoped that was true. 

"I'll make us some coffee." said Vanya, before rising from her seat. 

!! 

"𝘝𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘢?" 𝘍𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘤𝘬𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘰𝘰𝘳, 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘔𝘰𝘻𝘢𝘳𝘵'𝘴 𝘚𝘺𝘮𝘱𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘺 𝘯𝘰.40 𝘪𝘯 𝘎 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘰𝘳 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘢 𝘴𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘢𝘭𝘵. 

"𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘵, 𝘍𝘪𝘷𝘦?" 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘶𝘳𝘮𝘶𝘳𝘦𝘥, 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘦𝘺𝘦𝘴 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘹𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴. 

"𝘏𝘦'𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦, 𝘝𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘢, 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘧𝘦," 𝘩𝘦 𝘶𝘳𝘨𝘦𝘥, 𝘳𝘰𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘦𝘺𝘦𝘴. "𝘕𝘰𝘸 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘮𝘦, 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶." 

𝘕𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘥, 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘥 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘨𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘤𝘰𝘰𝘭 𝘴𝘤𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘦 𝘪𝘯𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘥. 𝘈𝘴 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘴 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘢 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥. 

𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘭𝘰𝘤𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘍𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘨𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘴. "𝘓𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴, 𝘝𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘢! 𝘐𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘪𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘧𝘶𝘭?" 

𝘝𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘢 𝘨𝘢𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘥. 𝘞𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘴 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭 𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘬𝘦𝘳. 𝘌𝘶𝘭𝘦𝘳'𝘴 𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘙𝘪𝘦𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘯'𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘶𝘭𝘢, 𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘭 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘵𝘺, 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘤𝘳𝘢𝘸𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘸𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘴. 𝘐𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘴 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘺𝘮𝘱𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘪𝘦𝘴. 

"𝘐𝘵'𝘴 𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘻𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘍𝘪𝘷𝘦, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳?" 

𝘍𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘴𝘩𝘳𝘶𝘨𝘨𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘳𝘦𝘱𝘭𝘺. "𝘍𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘐 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘢𝘨𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘪𝘨𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘰𝘶𝘵! 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘢𝘤𝘰𝘳𝘯 𝘢𝘴 𝘐'𝘷𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘥!" 

𝘝𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘢 𝘴𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘥𝘭𝘺. "𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘥𝘰 𝘪𝘵." 𝘍𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘨𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬. 

"𝘖𝘯𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘺, 𝘸𝘦'𝘭𝘭 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘮𝘦. 𝘞𝘦'𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳, 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘭𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘥𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘥𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘺 𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘭 𝘸𝘦'𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘭 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦. 𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘦." 

𝘝𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘢 𝘨𝘪𝘨𝘨𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵. "𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘮𝘦, 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩? 𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘓𝘶𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳, 𝘰𝘳 𝘋𝘪𝘦𝘨𝘰, 𝘰𝘳 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘉𝘦𝘯?" 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘥𝘰𝘶𝘣𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘢𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘢 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘰 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘢 𝘴𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳.

𝘍𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘴𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘺 𝘴𝘯𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘦𝘥, 𝘢𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘴𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘮 𝘰𝘧 2 𝘢𝘯𝘥 1. "𝘉𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘯."

!! 

Of all the stupid decisions that he made, cutting a deal with the Handler was the worst of them all. Dolores must be disappointed in him. 

Now he was in the Commission bathroom, figuring out how to allow the Hindenburg disaster to happen. (Actually, he figured that out thirty minutes ago. He was actually figuring out how to delay the apocalypse without the Handler breathing down his neck.) 

Dutifully ignoring the annoying colleague who kept bugging him to have lunch with the others, he bided his time by stealing the folder out of said annoying colleague's desk and read it thoroughly. It was until he felt a presence next to him when he slid the folder up his shirt.

"I've seen you've done your work, Number Five," she spoke, her tone cloyingly sweet. He knew that was far from the truth. "You know, you can spend the rest of your life here. You belong here, and you know it."

"Yeah, I suppose I do." he suppressed a grimace as he smirked to himself.

"Are you hungry? We can have lunch in my office," Peering down at him, she added, "My treat." She winked at him before she burst open the door, hearing her heels clicking along the hallway. 

"Some lunch." he muttered to himself whilst shuddering inwardly. He scribbled down some notes before joining her in her office. He didn't want to raise suspicion. Yet. 

!! 

When he was stuck in the apocalypse, he learned that counting to infinity would help calm him down. "Think of the numbers, 5," he would often remind himself. "It's a perfect system of 9s, oh so perfect." Whenever he thought of his siblings' dead bodies, he focused on the 9s until all that was in his head would be the pre-defined concept of infinity instead of the blood (there was too much). 

It doesn't work all the time, though. Some days, he would wake up screaming but no one came. (Why would no one come?) Some days, he would cry into Delores's shoulder, listening to her soothing voice, or his perception of it. And some days (and those were really rare), he would think of Vanya and Ben and Klaus and the others, living life as usual. Obla-di, obla-da. He couldn't care less about the old man, but he just wanted to see his siblings weary not from fighting, but from a night of partying or studying. 

He counted all the way to infinity once more, but this time, he mentioned all six of his siblings (because he didn't want to forget them when he got back). 

!! 

"You know what, guys? I think I'm going to just stay out on this one. I've been sober for two days and I think it's really starting to get to me-" 

Diego simply hurled a knife in his direction. Five raised an eyebrow in response. "So, you coming with us, or not?" 

Klaus grumbled the whole way. "I just don't understand why you even need me! What do you want me to do, summon up some dead guy, or worse, Dad, and ask them about the apocalypse? 'Oh, pardon my French, but how does the world end?' Last I checked, you two had the long end of the stick in terms of powers, so you sort this one out yourselves!" 

"Klaus, so help me God, if you don't shut up right now, I'll make sure that I never miss next time. Got it?" growled Diego as he slammed the door shut. 

"Straight people, am I right?" he chuckled, nudging Five with his elbow. He shook his head as if to say 'not now'. Klaus got the hint. Just when he was about to push past the already open gate, Five called out after him.

"Say, Klaus, can you see Ben?" 

Klaus paused and turned around. "What did you just say?" whispered Klaus in a dangerously low tone. 

"Ben. I know he's dead, mainly because Vanya mentioned it in her book. Managed to grab a copy." 

"Y-yes I can. Actually, he's here right now. Why?" he asked, eyes narrowed at him. 

"No, it's not a joke of some kind. I just want to tell him that I love him, and I-I'm really sorry for leaving." 

Klaus's face softened, and for a second, he could see Ben smiling at him. So this was what happy felt like. He needed more of this.

"Anyway," his face hardened, "We need to stop the apocalypse. Come on, let's see what Harold Jenkins has to tell us." 

As he headed into the house, he heard Klaus telling Ben everything, word for word. The thought made him smile.

!! 

He was wrong. Staring at his equations once more, his frustration grew. How could he not see this? It was an anomaly, a constant that threw off the balance. Harold was simply the fuse and Vanya was the ticking bomb watching, waiting. 

Glancing at his sister from the seats, he saw his sister finally get the spotlight for once. Not Luther, not Diego, her. He felt every note, every rest, every tempo, it all contained the hurt buried for 26 years. Gone was the girl who prepared peanut butter and marshmallow sandwiches when he would have a bad day, in her place was the harbinger of the apocalypse, the one who wrecked his family in the first place. 

"Okay guys, I go on the right, Diego goes on the left, and you two go from the front. When I give my cue, we surround her. Got it?" shouted Luther, quiet enough not for her to hear. 

Waiting for the rest to take their positions, he remembered that people were congruent to chemical reactions. The tension was there, the lack of love was present too. Ostracization? Check. Time spent in an underground chamber? Hell yes. Harold was the catalyst that sped up the reaction, but he got harmed in the process, so there's that. Could he change anything? Maybe spend time with her more, include her in missions, show her that, yes, they did love her. That was all she wanted anyway. But it was too late. He was always too late.

"Now!" Luther shouted. He ran alongside Luther and Diego as they wrenched her from her violin. Suddenly, he felt a force pull him back. Tugging him by the collar, he stared at a smirking Vanya as she continued with her solo. 

"Vanya, please. I didn't mean to leave you for so long. I would have taken you with me. If we stop this, I can take you with me. We can travel to any decade and century like we've always wanted until we're old and gray." He heard himself say, but the words wouldn't come.

"Old and gray," she murmured slowly, a smile dawning upon her face. The shot followed after. 

"Is she still breathing?" asked Luther, a worried expression on his face. Five knelt down, feeling for a pulse.

"Yes, she's still alive." he sighed in relief. 

"Uh, guys?" said Klaus. "Is a moon rock supposed to hit the Earth, or is it just me?" 

No. No, no, no. Pacing up and down in despair, he could hear the Handler laughing at him. He failed. It wasn't supposed to end this way. They were the Umbrella Academy, they could do this! Wild-eyed, he faced the rest of the group. 

"I can travel through time again," he spoke, "But this time, you're coming with me." 

"Have you even done this before?" asked Diego. 

"No, but it's worth a shot." 

As they all gathered around, Vanya and Ben included, he held out a silent plea that this, this suicide mission, worked. He just couldn't bear to lose his family once again. 

**Author's Note:**

> Five is the best damn member of the Umbrella Academy don't @ me


End file.
